I originally planned for today’s post to be something completely different than my own thoughts, but last night, troubles plaguing my friends seemed to inspire this post. I don’t like to see my friends hurting; it hurts me when they hurt.
So with that being said, let’s begin.
Everybody deserves to be loved. Everybody deserves happiness. If you’ve been lucky enough to find your “soulmate” at a young age and lucky enough to be married and starting a little family young, then go on hats off to you – that’s awesome. If you haven’t been lucky yet, that’s okay too. Everybody has to kiss a few frogs before they get to their prince or princess charming and that’s okay. You’ll get there; it’s no rush.
Ladies and gentlemen, I just want to say something. When you get a boyfriend or girlfriend, do not allow yourself to become so consumed by that person and so blinded by love that you cannot see when they’re clearly in the wrong about something. I hear and see so many young women and men losing themselves in a relationship out of fear of calling out their partner. They don’t want to start an argument, they don’t want to face the fact that the relationship they so desperately want to work out is fading away to nothing and leading on a dangerous path of controlling and obsessive behavior.
They do not understand that it is hurting more to hold on rather than to just let go and find someone else.
There’s a song I heard ages ago – I can’t remember who it is by but it goes; “Tell me if this is love or am I just too comfortable”. I fear that is what happens with people; they become “comfortable” in a relationship. They are clearly unhappy, they continue to try and convince themselves that they are in love when they’re not. They tell themselves that things will get better. The relationship has become their comfort and they do not want to leave, scared of things changing completely.
Then there’s another thing. They begin to distance themselves clearly due to the fact that they cannot face the fact that they are going to have to hurt that person a bit by telling them that they don’t want to be with them anymore. Well news flash:
It will definitely hurt more the longer you drag things out.
Then there’s the case where people see that their partner is changing, but they try so hard to ignore it – and this hurts so bad because they know there’s no longer a figure. Then suddenly, they find the courage to stand up for themselves and say “No more. I want to be happy.” They end that toxic relationship; they knew it was over a long time ago anyway.
I’m sharing my thoughts to say this – don’t stay somewhere if you don’t want to be there, don’t make yourself unhappy just because you’re “comfortable”. Someone out there is dying to be with you, dying to call you their better half but you’re staying with someone who clearly doesn’t give a toss about you. Don’t do that; you’re only hurting yourself more.
And for those who are purposely distancing themselves because they feel too comfortable in secure with saying they have a “significant other” to just end it when they clearly aren’t happy or wanting it anymore. The longer you drag it out, the more things will hurt. Don’t waste a person’s time. I understand you don’t want to break a heart, but you have to worry about yourself sometimes and do what makes YOU happy. If not wanting to be with someone anymore will make you happy, then that’s just the way the cookie will crumble.
You deserve better.
Make your hearts happy, guys.
Next post is on Wednesday.
Over and out.