Back Again with the Thoughts

Hey everybody!

So, today’s blog was supposed to be a black history fact and sorts, but I think starting on Wednesday, I’ll be posting the facts and I’ll just continue with those for the rest of the month. I also want to apologize for not blogging on Wednesday. I’ve had such a cold this week and didn’t have the energy to write anything. Anyways, I’m back now.

I won’t be saying the inspiration behind this post. This is simply…thoughts.

It’s never fun for anyone to have their feelings just stomped on. Many people find it difficult; becoming attached to someone, only for that someone to rip the rug right from under the person and give reasons as to why they’ve done just that. Even though the person may try to understand as best they can, and even when they say they understand and that things are cool; it’s never actually cool is it?

It is never cool.

People are meant to feel; it’s human nature, isn’t it? So, feelings for people aren’t just shut off, right? It takes time for feelings to shut off, especially if people are “so in love” the way they say they are. But then there’s that case where the other person’s feelings seem to just stop and shut off within a couple weeks of a “break up” or whatever, while the other person is still holding on, trying to pick up the pieces of a broken heart. They say that if feelings shut off quickly, they weren’t ever real in the first place or they were over long before the other (broken) party truly knew that the feelings were no longer mutual. Then there’s cases of both parties’ feelings being over long before the break up happened, but for this blog, let’s discuss how the broken party is still holding on to something while the other person’s feelings are no longer mutual.

That sucks, doesn’t it?

It sucks that people give so much to another person – they try so hard when they themselves aren’t perfect, they try to change themselves and be better, to learn as they go along I suppose. Is that ever enough? I guess not; because they still end up feeling so lost and broken and alone.

The other party begins to move on, having feelings for someone knew while the other party is still broken and lost. The broken party tries so hard to be positive and upbeat, to try and find the “good” that has come out of something so destructive. They think that there’s a good reason behind the destruction, they remember that everything happens for a reason; and they just need time to figure themselves out and for those true feelings of love to fade so they can move on a little better.

But then, they just get another crushing blow – they find out that the other party who they are trying to forget about has feelings for someone new. It sucks when a person is so in love with someone, yet that person already has feelings again for someone new. Now there really is no chance. There was never a chance for reconciliation apparently, and now all sparks of hope have gone to absolute nothing.

And this is when the broken party has had enough.

They scream. They cry. They rant and rave to their friends. They explode to that other person. God, they have had enough. They feel lost and stupid, wondering why they bothered to ever hold on to any sparks of hope when clearly, it was never happening in the first place. Everything just hurts now; there’s an actual nagging pain in their chest where their heart is, their eyes are sore from the tears, they feel as though all their feelings and emotions have just been stepped on and walked over. They know that getting angry isn’t the solution nor will it solve anything, but that’s the only outlet sometimes isn’t it?

That’s the only outlet – to get angry; to go punch a wall, go scream until their lungs give out, go run and run and run until the traces of anger have washed away. But the feelings are still there, and it hurts so hard to feel. It hurts to the core, doesn’t it? There’s that nagging pain in their chest again, there are the tears brimming in their eyes; it hurts so much.

Sometimes, a person just wants to stop feeling for a second and be numb, don’t they?

And in time, everything will be okay and the sun will rise again. But for the moment, there is no justifying actions or talking things out. That “broken” party has to “grieve” this in their own way. Let them feel what they want to feel; let them be angry, let them cry – let them do what they want to do.

That is all.

-Me xo

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